Ah, so that’s what they mean!

Ever wondered what those editorial quotes on the backs of books are all about?
Here’s a quick guide:

a real tear-jerker writing so bad it makes you cry
a writer to watch as opposed to one you are actually want to read
absorbing makes a great coaster
accessible not too many big words
acclaimed poorly selling
affecting I felt something. Could’ve been the book. Could’ve been indigestion.
an ebook original no proofreading and bad formatting
breathless prose needs resuscitating
brilliantly defies categorization even the author has no clue what he’s turned in
dazzling prose so gorgeous you won’t really notice that nothing happens
definitive could have used an editor
edgy irritating
epic very long
erotic porn
gripping there’s something sticky on the cover
haunting sat unfinished for months while I read other stuff.
heart-warming major character is a dog, an old guy, or both
in the proud tradition of J R R Tolkien has a dwarf in it
literary plotless
long-awaited late
luminous not much happens
lyrical not much happens
magisterial long
meticulously researched overloaded with footnotes
novella a short story with a large font
promising début flawed
provocative about race/religion/sex
rollicking chaotic
sensual soft porn
stunning a major character dies
unflinching has a lot of bad words
weighty I’ve been lugging this monster all over town and I still can’t bring myself to finish it
wildly imaginative the writer must’ve been on drugs

(Freely adapted from One-Minute Book Reviews)

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